Loving “idols” too much! What should we do?
The “Internet Trend” of the New Six Ethics: “Fan Idol Ethics”
The structure of human relationships in Chinese culture includes the “Five Relationships” of ruler and subject, father and son, husband and wife, elder and younger brothers, and friends. Mr. Li Guoding, a politician and economist, was invited to speak at the Annual Meeting of the Chinese Sociological Society, where he proposed the concept of the “New Six Relationships,” which emphasizes the relationships between “the group and the self” and “the group and me.” (Source:http://blog.udn.com/niennien1234/7700886;https://baike.baidu.com/item/第六倫).
However, as times have progressed, in today's internet trends, as long as we frequently "browse, act, and connect" online, it is not difficult to find that besides the "friends" in the Five Relationships and the "group-self" and "group-me" relationships in the New Six Relationships, there is an additional circle of relationships — the "netizens" or "online friends."
Within the multilayered circle of "netizens," there is yet another circle of "friend groups" that appear faintly in some public "non-mainstream corners."——"Idol stars and fans" (tentatively called "Idol-Fan")Relationship）, which further extends to"fans and fans"（tentatively call it“fan-friends”a "fan-friends relationship".）—not sure which of the six ethical relationships it belongs to, let’s temporarily include it under the “New Six Ethics” and tentatively refer to it as——The New Six Relationships: “Internet Trends” and the “Ethics of Idol-Fan Culture”
So-called “idol celebrities” can include figures from the entertainment industry (such as actors, singers, directors, dancers, models, etc.), sports champions (like baseball, soccer, or basketball players), political and economic figures (such as heads of state or outstanding leaders), and public figures from various professions frequently exposed in the media (like culinary masters or prominent news personalities). With the increasing availability of media resources online, once these individuals reach high levels of exposure, they can attract a fan base numbering in the tens of thousands—or even more.
The “ethics of idol-fan culture” in today’s internet trends can be seen as a “special relationship” within a “unique subculture” of modern life.
Based on the author’s recent focus on how film and television culture influences everyday life, this article takes “idol celebrities” from the entertainment industry as examples—along with true stories experienced by real individuals such as Xiao An, Xiao Lai, Xiao Ting, Xiao Bai, Xiao Ke, and Xiao Han—to explore and reflect on fan behavior. By examining emotional attachment, star-chasing actions, the factors behind attraction, and the degree of dependency, it seeks to observe, sense, and understand the dynamics and interaction patterns between “fans and idols” as well as “fans and fellow fans.”
The relationship and interaction patterns between "fans" and "idols":
From that instant spark of infatuation, one can feel the depth of affection—
Xiao An passed by the TV, glanced quickly, then suddenly turned back, her almond-shaped eyes wide open. She immediately fixed her gaze on the screen, watching the MTV music program without blinking. "So handsome!" Her mouth curled from a downward frown into a horizontal smile...
Xiao Lai walked into an audio-visual store, browsing row after row. He casually strolled to the magazine rack, and exclaimed, "Hmm..." upon spotting a familiar face. "A special issue?" He quickly grabbed a copy and flipped through the pages one by one, murmuring, "Heh... handsome... this photo is so cool..."
Xiao Ting opened the newspaper and quickly scanned every column... every box in the entertainment section... "Concert? Taipei!" She immediately leaned closer, holding her breath as she read every single word: "Ah... they're really coming to Taipei!" A wave of joy surged from her heart like a tsunami. "Ah... ah... hahaha! Thank the Lord!"
“Sharp-tongued? No way! That’s professionalism, okay?” Xiao Bai watched the show, speaking to the person on screen: “Yes, to be professional you have to be trained... you have to be dedicated!”
At night, Xiao Ke quietly watched a drama, thinking, "So elegant... such subtle expression in the eyes..." When it ended, she turned off the TV, her heart still lingering on the thought: "How can he be so handsome one moment, so adorable the next, and even when he's hurt, he still makes me feel tender…"
Xiao Han was casually watching a drama with her family when she suddenly noticed “him” during a scene where he was killing enemies, and was drawn in by “that murderous aura”…
Fans’ instinctive love for their idols is often unreasonable and difficult to explain clearly.
From the act of idol chasing, one can feel the powerful, ever-burning passion—
Xiao An, Xiao Lai, and Xiao Ting have all experienced buying photos, posters, magazines, and searching for newspaper articles.
Xiao Ting also joined fan discussion websites, followed news updates, attended concerts, collected VCDs, watched TV shows, and followed movies.
Xiao Bai went even further, traveling to various filming locations, chasing after book signings, birthday parties, and handshake events.
Xiao Ke and Xiao Han are almost always in front of the computer daily, joining fan communities and following all kinds of videos: TV shows, movies, trending topics...
Their “idols” each have different identities—some are singers, actors, music producers, or talent show judges.
If asked, "At what moment, or because of what factor, are you attracted to him?" the reasons are mostly similar—
Xiao An was attracted when she felt bored due to the heavy workload in high school; Xiao Lai, Xiao Ting, and Xiao Bai all felt frustrated after starting work for a period of time—they encountered bottlenecks at work, lacked a sense of achievement, had poor interpersonal relationships, felt gloomy, and impatient. At such critical moments, the first thing that caught their attention was the handsome appearance of the celebrity! Their professional performance (such as acting skills, stage presence, etc.) then became the second wave of attraction that followed.
Xiao Ke and Xiao Han, regarding the celebrities they admire, also develop feelings of affection, respect, curiosity, and compassion because of the celebrities’ personal character, experiences, and unique stories.
In summary,"The timing and factors that attract people to idols often occur during their own times of difficulty, when they find someone to divert their stress and project their feelings of longing."
What to do when you love them too much?
Xiao An, Xiao Lai, Xiao Ting, Xiao Bai, Xiao Ke, and Xiao Han are a group of sisters, each with their own "idol."
But they also have an identity of their own — as Christians.
Since they are Christians, they should have received some biblical teaching about "idols." The Old Testament, in Exodus 20:2-5, records: "I am the Lord your God... You shall have no other gods before me. You shall not make for yourself an idol, nor any likeness of anything in heaven above, on the earth beneath, or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or serve them, for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments."
An "idol" refers to anyone or anything in our hearts that takes a higher place or greater importance than God. In other words, when the principles by which we live, work, and make decisions depend excessively on people, things, or circumstances—more than on looking to and trusting God—those people, things, or circumstances become "idols."
These "idol principles" are well known to Xiao An, Xiao Lai, Xiao Ting, Xiao Bai, Xiao Ke, and Xiao Han! But the problem is,If you truly like "them" in your heart, what should you do?Their family and friends remind them at different times:
"Watching these all day long..." "Hoo~ idol worship, huh..." "Don't get obsessed..." How do they manage their feelings toward their "idols"?
How to maintain a balanced relationship with "idols"?
Xiao An and Xiao Lai bring their concerns for their "idols" into prayer, asking God to watch over them.
Xiao Ting occasionally murmurs quietly to herself: "Heavenly Father, I know You don’t like people worshiping idols, I’m sorry. But I really like him. What should I do? Please help me not to spend too much time on this star. Is there a higher, more meaningful way I can follow so that I won’t just be idolizing a celebrity?"
The idea of "praying for him and caring about the environment he is in" came to Xiao Ting’s mind. So, Xiao Ting not only prayed for the health and safety of her beloved star but also extended her prayers to the partners he frequently works with.
Xiao Bai, Xiao Ke, and Xiao Han took it a step further by praying for the entertainment industry environment in which the stars worked.
Attitudes Toward “Idols”
Over the years, through firsthand experience and extensive observation, Xiao An, Xiao Lai, Xiao Ting, Xiao Bai, Xiao Ke, and Xiao Han—driven by their genuine passion for those celebrities and their nearly daily prayers—have gathered some insights, which they roughly summarize and share below—
1. Celebrities—including those in film and television, sports stars, public figures in politics and economics, and people from all walks of life—are only “treated as” idols, but ultimately they are just human beings, not gods.
2. They are constantly placed on a “pedestal” as “male gods” or “female gods” by companies, media, and fans. This is actually harmful to them, often leading to subsequent crises—long-term loneliness and pressure from being in such a high position can cause physical, mental, and spiritual illnesses. Many celebrities suffer from depression.
3. Since they are human, they inevitably have moments of human weakness. Rather than worrying aimlessly, it is better to pray for their daily safety and physical, mental, and spiritual health.
4. Since you like them so much, you probably often follow their updates. You can treat information about them as prayer items. While praying for them, you are also reminding yourself to regard them as a friend and entrust them to God—this is truly the ordinary way to treat them as regular people.
5. To love them is also to protect them—learn not to be swayed by gossip or to spread rumors recklessly.
6. Sometimes also consider their strengths and weaknesses. Positive qualities can be learned from; negative words and behaviors should be reserved, which also clearly shows that they are truly ordinary people.
The Relationship and Interaction Patterns Between “Fans” and “Fans”
The easiest groups to gather in everyday life are online communities.
Some fans create elaborate websites dedicated to their beloved idols, complete with a responsible site administrator and supporting moderators. These sites serve as interactive spaces where fans freely express their love for the idol. Some websites even call themselves "families," fostering a sense of closeness among fans. Xiao Ting and Xiao Bai have both experienced and frequently participated in such communities.
In recent years, online communities have mostly leaned toward setting up fan pages on Facebook, Twitter, Weibo, and the like. Some are formed by fans, while others are established by the stars’ own studios or management companies, allowing for immediate and rapid release of new information; Xiao Ke and Xiao Han often frequent these spaces.
Additionally, there are concerts that Xiao Ting has attended; book signings, birthday parties, and handshake events that Xiao Bai has participated in; and award ceremonies (such as the Golden Horse Awards) that Xiao Ke was invited to by fellow fans, but Xiao Ke didn’t go and instead stayed home watching TV.
Among the many fans and different groups, there occasionally arises an ambiguous feeling of being “seemingly friends but actually rivals” or “both friends and rivals.”
Xiao Ting recalls—
I once clicked into the webpage of "another family" out of curiosity, but later felt somewhat hurt by being treated with "indifference."
Reflection: Some fan groups have extremely strong internal cohesion, and correspondingly strong exclusiveness; their "cold treatment" can be likened to a form of "cold bullying."
Xiao Han recalled a passage—
I have seen the explosive atmosphere on community message boards—there are passionate comments from "true fans," sharp insults from "ex-girlfriend’s fans," confrontations between "ex-girlfriend’s fans" and "current girlfriend’s fans," as well as debates where "true fans" jump in to support and defend their idols...
Reflection: Is it really worth fighting so intensely over an idol’s private life? What benefit does it bring to them? If you truly feel you belong to different "camps," just don’t join in. So why enter someone else’s "family" to taunt, challenge, and argue?
However, among the many interactions that Xiao Ting, Xiao Bai, Xiao Ke, and Xiao Han have with their fan community, the above three scenarios only account for a very small fraction; most of the time, the atmosphere is overwhelmingly positive. In the vast sea of the internet, these fans are like another group of “close neighbors.”
Most fans, united by their love for the same idol, develop a bond of “destined meeting from a thousand miles apart” because they got to know each other through him. There are always a few “super-sensitive” hardcore fans who first receive information, photos, or media links from various sources, then share them with the fan community. At moments like these, fans can truly relate to the saying: “A distant relative is not as helpful as a near neighbor.”
Sometimes, through shared photos, journals, and messages, fans can learn about each other’s life updates and emotional struggles. Some even share helpful tips on handling situations, health knowledge, and emotional management out of care. As a result, within the fan community, there are a few who become “life mentors.” This is truly the most beautiful layer of relationships in the “fan friend ethics” of the “new six relationships” in the internet era.
Who can be the “neighbor” and peace ambassador between idols and fans?
The "Fan-Star Ethics" within the "New Six Relationships" of the Internet era can be extended from those working in film and television to sports champions, political and economic figures, and public personalities across various fields, as well as their diverse groups of fans.
As fans of certain celebrities who are also Christians, we at least have the teachings of the Bible as our guiding principles and a God to whom we can pray and entrust our concerns. This helps us maintain a balanced relationship with our "idols." However, for other fans who do not yet know God and are unfamiliar with biblical teachings—when they truly treat their idols as “gods,” relying entirely on their "male gods" or "goddesses" for their daily thoughts and emotions; when they do not know how to pray and have no outlet for spiritual guidance; when they are easily swept up in gossip and lost in rumors; when they blindly adore their idols and imitate even their bad examples—it can easily lead to distortion and confusion in their lives.
Who will be their “neighbor” to care for them and help them?
For most people who “love idols,” their families and friends often dismiss their behavior as trivial, treat it as a joke over casual conversation, let them go crazy, or even sneer at them. Those who can’t stand it might resort to scolding with a lecturing tone—but such words do not address the root issue, and the listener’s behavior remains unchanged. As a result, they are even more easily cast aside, merely becoming a topic of gossip at the dinner table.
As a Christian who often interacts with “fellow fans from the same fandom or camp,” have you realized that you might be one of the few who truly understands why they love their idol so deeply? Have you seen this as a special role or calling? Because no one else may have greater empathy for them than you do—would you be willing to extend a caring hand and “help lift them up”?
We cannot demand how an "idol" should interact with their fans, nor can we force other fans to befriend us. But we can start with prayer, and from there, cultivate ways of care that are within our ability.
Prayer directions for caring for “fellow fans”
1. Daily safety in going out and coming in, and good health.
2. Pay attention to their faith and the condition of their soul in various ways.
3. Pray that the Lord blesses them through oneself.
4. Pray that the Lord grants wisdom and tactful words, helping oneself to have a personal testimony to guide them away from over-relying on their "idol."
5. In attitude, through liking the same "idol star," you may also get to know some fellow fans and can mutually care for each other in daily life; also, respect the "idols of other fans," without comparing or confronting between different fan groups.
Most family members and friends of those who "love idols" can no longer really understand their passion for idols, nor can they easily imagine or comprehend the grudges and conflicts that may exist between them and fellow fans. Even if they tell their family about some disputes with certain fans, the family’s response is often just to advise: "Don’t interact with them anymore. Isn’t it enough to just not add them as friends?" Prayer? They don’t know the other person, so why bother spending time and energy praying for them?
Xiao Ke has a small personal testimony in this area—
Because I didn’t participate in a big event organized by fellow fans, later someone in the community blamed me for not joining. Rationally, I knew it was okay, but emotionally I was still somewhat affected... Later, I prayed about it. Although I had no idea what kind of life or work that person had, I still tried my best to consider their situation and asked God to watch over the fan’s life and work...
A few months later, because of another matter, I actually received a message from that person through a private message! I felt that she was sending me a message of "friendship"... After thanking God, I also replied to her: Thank you!
Testimony: God actually received my prayers for a "distant fan friend I didn’t know," He saw the small friction between her and me, knew my little emotions, and He cared for and listened to these prayers from the "small corners" of life. Even when I didn’t know what to do, this situation was just “relieved”...
Epilogue, and also the beginning.
Originally, I was unsure whether to write about the "Idol Fan Ethics" within the "New Six Relationships" of the "Internet Trend," hesitating for quite some time. Later, it was the countless incidents reported in the news that became the final push to proceed—
The intense and indescribable emotions between certain county and city mayoral candidates and their fans, as well as the frequent verbal battles and online warfare between fans themselves and between supporters of the same or opposing camps—accusing each other of being "real fans," "fake fans," or "enemy fans suspected of infiltrating"—I couldn’t help but realize: these things… are not unfamiliar to me, they feel like déjà vu—I have experienced them all!
I just don’t have the “idol-fan interaction experience” from the political arena; what I do have is from the entertainment industry. But because human nature, emotions, behavior patterns, and ways of interacting are more or less similar, I prayed and asked God, “Can I write this?” I also asked Him to guide me as I wrote. Thus, this sharing came about—line by line, hoping that by describing experiences through the empathy gained from the entertainment industry’s idol-fan relationships, it could replace preaching.
The insights I have experienced?
If you want to ask: Why am I so familiar with the experiences of Xiao An, Xiao Lai, Xiao Ting, Xiao Bai, Xiao Ke, and Xiao Han? Am I their close reporter? Or a counselor who spends every day with them?
If I say: Xiao An, Xiao Lai, Xiao Ting, Xiao Bai, Xiao Ke, and Xiao Han are all myself, would you believe it?
Xiao An was me during high school; from Xiao Lai, Xiao Ting to Xiao Bai, they represent different stages of me after I started working; Xiao Ke and Xiao Han are me from the past three years. All the little stories above are my “fan experiences” over more than thirty years. God never pressured me constantly with the Ten Commandments; the insights I organized are all from my prayers and reflections—my conversations with God. God is the one who listens to my heart and helps me sort out my feelings and thoughts—a truly caring counselor.
And it is precisely because I can understand and empathize with the love, passion, and worries that “fans from the same family or camp” have for their “idols,” as well as my own experiences interacting with fellow fans, that I am willing to honestly and openly share these from a perspective of empathy.
To cast a brick to attract jade—
The “Internet Trend” of the New Six Ethics: “Fan Idol Ethics”Applicable to the performing arts, sports, political and economic sectors, and all industries.
You and I, as Christians who are fans of a certain idol—whether they are performers, athletes, political and economic figures, or public personalities from all walks of life—are hoped to be able to...be their "neighbor" and a peace ambassador among the many families and camps within the new Six Relationships' “Internet Trend” of “idol-fan ethics.”
Author Bio::
From 2014 to 2017, participated consecutively in four sessions of the KRC Cultural Camp; since 2016, have been paying attention to the influence of film and television culture on everyday life culture, and have often found that the communities of “idols” and “fans” are public yet hidden in certain corners of the internet, with mutual influence that should not be underestimated.