Standing at the crossroads of kindness and righteousness

Organized/Linda Pang

The three typical simulation cases in this article are comprehensively summarized based on the information obtained from interviews with multiple people. To protect the parties involved, the details have been changed and modified. Any similarity with actual cases is purely coincidental.

Unforeseen events rocked the church and shocked believers. "How could a pastor fall?" "He is a spiritual patriarch, how could he do such a thing?"

In the midst of shock and anger, what action should we, the members of the Lord, take? What options are there?

Simulation Case 1: Fired for misappropriating donations

This Sunday morning, worship at the Wuzicheng Chinese Christian Church in the northwest United States was about to begin, but Pastor A never showed up. The congregation found it strange that Elder Qin came on stage to preach, and the time of the speech was not mentioned. This is the first time in the past ten years that Pastor A has been absent without excuse.

When brothers and sisters asked whether the pastor was sick or had an emergency at home, the deacon hesitated and did not give a specific answer. Some people called and visited the pastor's house, but there was no response. Although the Wednesday prayer meeting was held as usual, without the familiar figures of the pastor and the teacher’s wife, the atmosphere just wasn’t right.

For the next few Sundays, worship was held as usual, but Pastor A and his family still did not show up. There was no mention of it in the weekly newspaper, leaving the brothers and sisters puzzled and feeling that something was fishy. After the meeting report was finished and he was about to announce the adjournment of the meeting, Uncle Wang, the eldest and most senior man, suddenly stood up and asked loudly: "Where is the pastor?"

At this time, the brothers and sisters all echoed: "What happened to the pastor?" "You have to ask for leave!" "What's going on?"

The chief executive finally realized that keeping silent was not an option, and finally decided to convene an emergency meeting and promised to make a public explanation to the members.

On the day of the meeting, the chairman of the deacon board stood on the podium again. After a brief prayer, he told the whole story with a solemn face:

An out-of-town missionary sent an email to the deacon board, thanking the brothers and sisters for their loving donation, which amounted to this amount, when the pastor went on a short-term mission last time. The treasurer felt that there was some discrepancy between this number and the check he had originally written, so he asked the pastor. The pastor said that for convenience, he converted the US dollars into local currency and transferred it. The difference should be due to the exchange rate and handling fees. But the treasurer calculated carefully and found that the discrepancy was still too large.

The deacon asked again and again, and the pastor said that the travel expenses provided by the church were not enough, and he would withdraw from the donation first and make up for it when he returned. The deacons would look back at past mission offerings, check the numbers with the missionaries, and discover that this had happened several times. Confronted again by the pastor, he finally admitted to misappropriating the offering. The board of trustees immediately decided to dismiss him and reached an agreement with the pastor. As long as he immediately stopped pastoring and moved away from the church, the church would not pursue legal responsibility.

After hearing these words, the brothers and sisters looked stunned. Suddenly a voice said: "Yes! Don't let a pastor commit such a crime!" "He is not qualified to lead us anymore!" Another voice said: "Pastors are also human beings and should be forgiven for doing wrong things!" "He worked hard to pastor the church, but he has no right to lead us!" Credit also comes with hard work!" But there are also voices saying: "The appointment of a pastor is approved by the membership meeting, and the dismissal also requires the approval of the members." Opinions came one after another.

At this time, the chairman on the podium once again raised his arms and shouted: "Brothers and sisters, please respect the decision of the Deacon Board. Pastor A's departure is not necessarily bad for the church, just like dough without leaven. Facing such a difficult moment, we must even more Let’s unite and not let Satan bring us down.”

It’s just that it’s still difficult for brothers and sisters to be of the same mind. The quarrel lasted for more than half a year, and a group of people who advocated pardoning the pastor left the church angrily. Those who agreed with the deacon board's decision continued to stay, but asked to be more cautious when hiring pastors to avoid encountering pastors whose conduct is not holy enough.

As for the whereabouts of Pastor A and his family, there is still no definite information. Some people say that he switched to a gospel organization, some say that he started churches in the southeast, and some say that he changed his career and stopped being a pastor...

Simulation Case 2: Leaving the church due to close relationship with secretary

The Chinese Bible Church is one of the landmarks in Xugo City. Chinese believers living in the West not only gather here, but also often hold community activities to serve local Chinese compatriots. What is rare is that Pastor B speaks fluent Chinese, Cantonese, and Spanish, and is deeply loved by the old, middle-aged and young members.

I don’t know when the church began to spread rumors that the pastor and his secretary had an unusual relationship. Some people said they saw the pastor and his secretary having dinner in a restaurant, and they were acting too intimately. Some people say that the secretary and the pastor spend a lot of time in the office together, with the door closed. When asked about the pastor, he cited "negotiation" as an excuse, "in one word." Such situations were becoming more and more common, so the deacon decided to communicate with the pastor first to find out what happened.

At first, Pastor B argued that the brothers and sisters were too rigid in traditional concepts. In Western countries, it is normal for friends of the opposite sex to eat, talk and laugh together. The secretary is also a member and needs companionship and guidance. How can the pastor refuse someone thousands of miles away? If members think this is inappropriate, then they shouldn’t. How can the pastor take care of his brothers and sisters when his hands and feet are tied?

Elders advised pastors that to protect their marriages and gain the trust of their members, they should draw clear boundaries with their secretaries or any members of the opposite sex.

One day, the secretary's husband angrily called the chairman of the deacon board and said that the pastor not only had an extramarital affair with the secretary, but also encouraged the secretary to leave her husband and promised to divorce his wife before marrying her. Brother Chairman was extremely shocked and called an emergency meeting, asking the pastor to come and explain.

Pastor B explained that his marriage was actually not happy. The teacher’s wife has a strong ability to serve. She often puts forward opinions on his preaching and the way he organizes ministries. Many times she pointed out his mistakes unceremoniously in front of the members. He feels disrespected and looks outside for comfort and validation. The secretary's marriage is not happy either. She feels that her husband cannot understand her emotional needs and is only busy with work. The two started just talking about each other's troubles, and then gradually discovered that the other person was their soul mate. He felt that it would be better to start over than to stay in his current marriage and suffer.

The deacons asked the pastor to stop serving and wait for further decisions. Unexpectedly, the pastor immediately submitted his resignation, saying that he wanted to leave everything and find a second love with his beloved. After that, the elders and members visited him again and again, hoping that the pastor would consider it carefully. His wife was also willing to forgive him for his affair, and the brothers and sisters promised to dedicate money to support the pastor and his wife in receiving marriage counseling. However, the pastor was determined to leave, refused any help, and finally left the family and the church, leaving everyone shocked and stunned.

▲When a pastor falls in a church, it is most likely to cause disputes, injuries, and divisions between co-workers and members of the congregation.

Simulation Case 3: From relapse to repentance

The Shengdao Association located in Jiayan Township in central Taiwan has a long history. Every Sunday morning, poetry echoes under the sky and in the alleys. Pastor C has been sent by the Holy Word Association to pastor this church for more than ten years. He and his wife served wholeheartedly, and the number of members increased day by day. The brothers and sisters saw this and often thanked God for them. In order to thank the pastor for his hard work, the dean encouraged him to take a month off and go to the Northern Seminary for further studies.

For some reason, Pastor C took another two weeks off after returning from further studies. Everyone thought, the pastor must be too tired! Unexpectedly, the deacons would suddenly issue a notice and convene an emergency meeting. The brothers and sisters waited for the meeting to begin with uneasiness.

Elder He walked up to the podium with a serious look on his face, and the first words he said after praying were: "The church is now facing a crisis and is particularly in need of God's mercy." What happened?

It turned out that while Pastor C was studying in the north, he stayed at the house of a college classmate and accidentally contacted his former girlfriend. In just a few weeks, the two rekindled their old relationship and ended up doing things that went against their marriage contract and the teachings of the Bible. When the pastor came back, he was filled with guilt. He finally admitted his fault to his wife and deeply blamed himself for giving in to temptation.

When the teacher's wife found out, she was shocked and angry. She wanted to take the child back to her parents' home several times, and even considered divorce. After praying with tears day and night and crying to God, the wife was willing to accept her husband again. The couple prayed for forgiveness before God and decided to inform the deacons. Although the result may be ruin, the priest is willing to accept it because it is the price of sin.

The initial reaction from the elders and deacons was quite fierce. Some proposed to fire the pastor immediately, while others severely criticized the pastor for being weak. Pastor C has repeatedly expressed regret, knowing that he has let everyone down and is no longer qualified to be everyone's shepherd. He can only hope for forgiveness from his co-workers and members.

After a long silence, Elder He stood up first, walked to Pastor C, put his warm hands on his shoulders, and began to pray for the pastor. All the co-workers gathered around the pastor and prayed loudly for God’s mercy. Before the meeting ended, everyone had reached a consensus: to accept the pastor’s apology, inform the General Conference of the whole story, and request brothers and sisters to continue to provide the pastor with emotional and spiritual support.

After finishing speaking, Elder He walked down from the podium, and Pastor C walked up to the crowd and admitted that what he had committed was a big mistake that offended both God and man. He begged the brothers and sisters that they may be disappointed in him, but not in God; they may want to leave this church, but do not leave God.

Some members came forward to comfort the pastor, but many people sat quietly and failed to respond.

Soon, the disciplinary committee of the General Conference came to the church to listen to the reactions of the pastor, deacons, members and other parties. A decision will always be made later, and since Pastor C is a first-time offender and sincerely repentant, there will always be a willingness to support him in marriage and spiritual counseling. During this period, I needed to leave my pastoral position and return to the General Assembly to take up administrative work. Observe for a year before making further decisions. The elders and brothers and sisters of the Jiayan Township Holy Word Association need to share in the ministry.

During this period, members gradually came to accept the entire incident. They often prayed for the pastor and his family and wrote letters of greetings. A year later, when the conference was held again, many people expressed their hope that Pastor C would come back. However, the General Conference arranged for him and his wife to visit various Holy Word churches to share God’s healing on the relationship between husband and wife in the past year, and to encourage brothers and sisters to cherish family relationships. Their testimony helped many people.

It is currently unknown whether Pastor C will return to Jiayan Township Holy Way Church to pastor the church in the future. The only thing that is certain is that this servant of God and his family will keep their faith and continue to serve God. Different actions produce different effects, and different effects bring different results. Standing at the crossroads of kindness and righteousness, go left? Go right? How do you decide?

Author profile

Lin Minwen devotes herself to literary ministry and focuses on writing and editing.