On this road, you are not alone
Visit to Mrs. Tang Bingwu of Chinese Christian Church in Montgomery County, Maryland
Interview/Jian Hailan
Picture provided/Tang Bingwu
Q: Please introduce your family and church. What ministries does the church focus on?
Soup:When we first came from China, my husband Yuan Xiao and I were both graduate students. My husband is particularly burdensome to students and scholars. On the day after his wedding, he invited them to come to his home for a Bible study meeting. The church grew from a Bible study group and has been officially established for more than ten years. 80% of the church’s members are from China, and some are from Taiwan or other places. Most of them are students, graduate students, or postdoctoral fellows. About 150 people attend worship every Sunday, and more than 80% are professional scholars. Therefore, there are many middle-aged people, and most of their children are teenagers. Therefore, the church has many ministries to lead teenagers. This is a challenge and a blessing from God to us.
The most central ministry of the church is equipping disciples and preaching the gospel. There are also Sunday school teachings on family and marriage during the year. The church attaches great importance to caring ministries, and most people have fellowship groups that have regular Bible study meetings every Friday. Two sons, Yitian and Yiqian, one graduated from middle school at the age of fourteen, and the other graduated from elementary school at the age of eleven.
Q: Currently you are still engaged in your original profession. How did you feel about the two completely different lifestyles when you switched from the high-tech professional field to serving God? What was the turning point?
Soup:After we got married, we both worked full time, and my husband was still attending seminary. I am engaged in medical biology research at the National Academy of Medical Sciences. I usually have to take care of students, and the work pressure is not small. But based on my passion for work, the more I do it, the more I discover the greatness of God, so I like this job very much. My husband has always loved the Lord. After getting married, I had a vague feeling in my heart that he had a burden to God and would eventually embark on the path of full-time service. However, when he proposed to quit his job to preach full-time, he was still struggling in his heart. After he quit his job, he spent a year praying at home so that he could understand God's leading. As we prayed together this year, I was filled with doubts: Is this the right path to take? Is it really after God’s heart? What will life be like in the future?
Before my husband started serving full-time, he was very busy with work and had limited service experience. For several years, Pastor Liu Chuanzhang and his wife from the local Chinese Bible Church worked tirelessly to teach and help us. The pastor and his wife often invited us to dinner and encouraged me to fully support my husband’s dedication. We have benefited a lot from their care and prayers. I have been slow to obey because I have been focusing on my own abilities instead of focusing on God. When I turned my focus to God, I asked myself: "Jesus died on the cross for me. What should I do to satisfy God?" Later I discovered: Nothing I do can satisfy God! Everything went smoothly after that, and I naturally started to support my husband’s decision. I continued my oncology research work and discovered that whether in church or in the workplace, they are actually two sides of the same service. Although the environment is different, the attitude towards life is the same.
▲Pastor Yuan Xiao and Mrs. Tang Bingwu took a photo in front of the statue of Jesus washing the disciples’ feet at Dallas Theological Seminary.
Q: How do you balance your busy family, work and church service? How to use limited time to take care of your physical, mental and spiritual needs?
Soup:When the church didn't have a preacher, my husband already served a lot. After becoming a preacher, we no longer had the opportunity to have private days off on Saturdays and Sundays. But we adapted quickly, and even the children adapted very well. They grew up in the church and have developed habits in many things. When I informed them of my decision to serve full-time, I also informed them of the changes that would occur in their lives. They were very sensible and said that they were willing to accept whatever their parents decided.
The children support with practical actions, help take care of young children in the church, and help youth music worship on Sundays. There was also a lot of heartfelt support. On weekdays, we mainly praise and encourage them and do not put pressure on them. When the eldest son asked to be baptized, he also reminded him: Don’t be baptized just because you are a pastor’s child. You must make your decision after careful consideration. Although the brothers inevitably bickered from time to time, they still loved each other. What makes us most gratified is that our eldest brother has had spiritual practice time every day since he was four years old, and his younger brother has also followed his elder brother's footsteps since he was a child. Our family has spiritual practice together twice a week; we sing, read the Bible, pray and talk to discuss the impact of biblical truth on our lives. Recently, the eldest son is in the teenage stage, and this kind of counseling is very helpful to him. Thank God for giving us two wonderful sons.
I have a period of time alone with God every day, and in God I surrender my whole day to Him, as well as my children. Since the pastor has many affairs in the church, some things also need to be handled by me. I have my own job and I have to take care of my children. I need this time to be alone with God to regain my strength in all aspects of my body, mind and soul. Today is the last day of school for two children and their graduation day. I knew that I would be very busy, so I got up at six in the morning to spend some time alone with God and let Him calm my heart. The children were on vacation, and in the afternoon my father took them to the church to play basketball. I got some time alone with God. I washed the dishes and talked to God at the same time. That feeling was very sweet. Although it was simple, it was very important to me.
▲The family took a group photo in Shenandoah National Park, Victoria, in August 2009.
Q: What ministries will you assist with at the church? What challenges and learnings have you faced while serving?
Soup:The church has different challenges at different times. Currently, 80% of the people in the church are involved in ministry. I mainly teach youth Sunday school and also support the pastor in caring visits. In addition, she leads a monthly sisters’ meeting. In the past year, she has been discussing a balanced life. In addition to Bible study and testimony sharing, she also goes out for outings and learns flower arranging and other small things in life, in order to build a healthy fellowship in the Lord. Sometimes he also accompanies the pastor to counsel members on marital issues. I have never studied counseling and often don’t know what to do. But always explain the biblical truth clearly first, and then listen to their voices. I think the most important thing when dealing with this kind of thing is not to bear the burden on yourself, but to put the parties involved and the problems that arise into the hands of God through prayer. I am always learning, and I ask God to give me the wisdom to learn well.
I remember that a brother in the church died in a car accident. His wife had just believed in the Lord for a year and their children were still young. The night it happened, I spent the night with my sister. She asked me why God treated her like this? I didn't have any explanation, I just cried with her. It was a great challenge. A year later, this sister testified that she felt deeply loved by her brothers and sisters after her husband passed away. I learned from this: A heart that sincerely cares for others is the most important thing.
Q: Please talk about your unique struggles and special needs in the role of a master mother?
Soup:When she first became a master's wife, a sister joked: "If you can't play the piano or sing, you can just change yourself to a master's wife!" I laughed out loud after hearing this. People ask me why I can laugh? Because I remembered that when Mrs. Liu encouraged me to come out and serve together with my husband, I thought that I would never be able to do as well as her, and I struggled because of the huge gap between myself and her. Later, I thought that the pastor and my wife were not gods, but all had human weaknesses, and I felt ridiculously stupid! I am grateful to the brothers and sisters in the church for their understanding of me and their understanding that I am busy with work and family, and often have to cook for our family on Sunday lunch. They care about my children and tolerate my mistakes. When I was sick on Sundays, the pastor would ask me to stay home and rest. This was the best comfort and encouragement to me.
Q: What is your most unforgettable memory in your career as a teacher? If you could do it all over again, what would you most like to improve?
Soup:What impressed us most was the encouragement given to us by Pastor Mai Xizhen. A few years ago, the church invited Pastor Mai to lead spiritual training, and we welcomed him to live in our home. After finishing his sermon on Sunday, there were still four hours before he went back. After the children went to Chinese school, he arranged a special program for us - inviting us to drink coffee. When each person had a cup of coffee in hand, he said: "No one needs to say anything. Serving is very hard! Don't forget your marriage. You must always have such time. The two of you sit together with the same heart and look at each other affectionately. No need to What to say." After that time, we learned to arrange time for the couple to get together, and even have separate date times with the two children, and the whole family benefited a lot.
Before I believed in the Lord, I had gone through many detours; I didn’t know how to be grateful to my parents, and I lacked principles in life. I was a child who was doted on by my grandma and had a short temper. When I participated in the pro-democracy movement in China, I felt that there was no truth in the world. I once thought: If there is no truth in the world, there will be no difference between living and dead! For a long time, I felt like I was living in darkness. However, on the third day after arriving in the United States in 1989, someone preached the gospel to me: "Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life..." (refer to John 14:6), which changed my life. Therefore, if I could start over, I would most want to believe in the Lord sooner so that I could be blessed sooner. This is why we need to bring our children into the Lord, and the younger the better. I believe: We may leave our children in the future, but God will never leave them. At present, I hope that I will progress further in my spiritual life and be able to serve God and people better.
Q: Please encourage our readers with a Bible verse.
Soup: "Who can separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation? Shall distress? Shall persecution? Shall hunger? Shall nakedness? Shall danger? Shall sword? As it is written : "For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are looked upon as sheep ready for the slaughter." But in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loves us, for I am convinced that whether it is death or death. Birth, not angels, not principalities, not powers, not things present, not things to come, not height, not depth, not the rest of creation, none of them can separate us from the love of God. separation; this love is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:35-39).The road of a preacher is not easy. I often use these verses to encourage myself, my husband, and my children. I would also like to share my encouragement with the readers of "Kingdom of God Magazine" here.
Interviewee profile
湯兵午，北京醫科大學畢業。1989年赴美就學於喬治城大學，同年信主。在美國家醫學科學院工作至今，從事腫瘤研究。現為蒙郡中華聖經教會師母。
Journalist profile
Jian Hailan loves literature and reading. She often writes about the life stories of her friends, using words to serve and experience God.