Don't stay at home

Parenting issues during the epidemic

Promise to give children mobile phones while staying at home

I especially like staying at home. I never dreamed that I would have to stay home to avoid the epidemic due to the new coronavirus. Having these days at home all the time is really an extra blessing from God. I'm happy to stay at home like this. But when I think of the epidemic area, my heart aches. I pray to Heavenly Father to stop the spread of the epidemic as soon as possible! When I think of my elderly parents alone in their hometown, I really want to leave my child to someone, just buy a ticket and fly back...

I remember that in the past, I had no choice but to leave home to go to work every day. I would often just walk to the workplace. I wish I could stay at home all the time! My daughter is also a homebody. As soon as the stay-at-home order was issued, we happily high-fived and "squatted at home."

During the holidays, I promised to give my daughter a mobile phone and read out the rules for using mobile phones, which was a good deal. When I really received the phone, I was reluctant to leave it. "Wait a minute, wait a minute" became my mantra. I often wait until I am so tired that I fall asleep, only to exclaim the next day: "Could this child have been looking at the mobile phone all night long?" I am very upset with myself, and I feel very anxious and distressed when I see the child tied up with the mobile phone.

▲The author accidentally saw the child holding the mobile phone and looking at it seriously, and suddenly realized that wasn't it his own shadow? It turned out that the child was just "imitating". (Schematic diagram, not party involved.)

Severe damage to parent-child relationship

For many days in a row, I looked at my children who were engrossed in looking at their mobile phones. I felt very uneasy and began to say something from the bottom of my heart: "You must do your homework on the plan before you can look at your mobile phone. Otherwise, it is not you who is using the mobile phone but the mobile phone." It’s costing you your life! How will you face the graduation exam if you look at your phone like this every day?”

She turned her head and glared at me: "Are you done? Shut up!" "It's very rude for you to speak like this!" "Believe it or not, I immediately threw your phone!"

I looked at her in disbelief. She picked up the expensive mobile phone given to me by her brother, and followed the "hum" sound in my nose, bang! The phone has been thrown to the ground hard. The child still couldn't get over his anger, so he immediately picked it up and slammed it down again!

Seeing that I was still looking at her blankly and not responding: "I'm going to tear up Teacher Mo Fei's book right now!" I rushed to intercept it as if I had just woken up from a dream, but in the end there were still two books that could not be saved...

I heard her pick up her phone and try to turn it on: "Oh! OK! It can't be turned on! It's finally completely broken!" Listening to her gloating to herself (probably mixed with anxiety and regret), my My heart felt like it had been stabbed so hard that it hurt; the child's hostility made me feel cold. Holding her torn book in despair, I fled to the balcony and huddled deeply in the corner like a pangolin in danger.

Lord, is this my child? Is this the child I worked so hard to raise? How can you raise it over and over again to develop a hatred? ! Why can't I bite the back of my tongue, knowing that talking about my child will irritate her? Why can't you learn to shut up? Why is it so hard for me to be quiet? ...I am really awesome, bringing out the worst side of my children.

Why did she tear up Teacher Mo Fei's book? She likes Teacher Mo Fei very much! Now I "hate the house and the night" because of boredom? Or, because the child can't get warmth and love from me, do you take it out on my favorite items?

▲The author confessed and repented before the Heavenly Father for his shortcomings.

See your own reflection in your children

During the current epidemic, everyone is not at work. Even if I were at work, I probably wouldn’t dare to take my phone to get it repaired!

In the days without mobile phones, I couldn't get into the situation of doing anything, so I just sat down and stood up again; I just wrote a few words, then turned around and flipped through a few pages of the book. Being bored, I had no choice but to bite the bullet and read a few books. It was a peaceful and beautiful experience that I had not seen for a long time. God nourished my thirsty heart through the experiences of the saints in the books.

While meditating, I accidentally saw the child holding her mobile phone and looking at it seriously - "I searched for him a thousand times in the crowd, but suddenly I looked back, and that person was in the dim light." Isn't that my shadow? That was clearly my image - I sat there motionless and scrolled through my phone for a long time. It turned out that the child was just "imitating"!

It is precisely because of the love of Heavenly Father that He showed me my situation. The child is like a mirror, reflecting my obsession with mobile phones, my wasting of time, and my debt to God and people... It’s me who needs to return to real life from swiping on my phone. It’s me who needs to repent. It’s me who needs to silently say sorry to my children. It’s me, it’s me!

▲The author apologizes to the children for saying unedifying words. I believe that by the grace of God, the relationship between mother and daughter will be completely restored in love.

Confess your sins to Heavenly Father and apologize to your children

"Oh! Abba! Thank you for your discipline. Thank you for waking me up by using your daughter to throw her cell phone. Abba, it's me who doesn't believe in you. If I really believe that you love me, send the Lord to die for me. On the cross, save me from all the pain and sorrow. I will not live so insecure and fearful; if I truly believe that You provide all the needs in life, I will not be so worried about what my daughter will do in the future if she does not learn well. What to do? Worry about her not having a good job, instead of grieving before You for her sins and praying for eternal blessings for her..."

With tears in my eyes, I walked over to my child and gently hugged her shoulders: "I'm sorry, dear baby, I said a lot of things that didn't help you. I was wrong, please forgive me, mom."

Whenever I am about to lose control of my mobile phone again, my father uses this "epidemic war" to remind me to repent quickly and return to what I should do. Whenever I want to remind my children to do their homework quickly, I often tell myself in my heart to bite the bullet, to be rebellious in my daughter’s youth, to teach by example rather than by words, and not to arouse the anger of my children.

This is really an extraordinary grace during the epidemic. Please Lord, let me never forget it.

Chen Yan, a mother who loves words, hopes to write down the blessings and love she has received with her heart.