{"id":5654,"date":"2024-04-03T17:20:51","date_gmt":"2024-04-03T21:20:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/kingdomresourcesforchrist.com\/?post_type=article&#038;p=5654"},"modified":"2025-08-14T12:53:38","modified_gmt":"2025-08-14T16:53:38","slug":"gaining-maintaining-christian-fellowship","status":"publish","type":"article","link":"https:\/\/e-krc.org\/en\/article\/gaining-maintaining-christian-fellowship\/","title":{"rendered":"Maintaining Fellowship"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Translated by Lin Yu<\/p>\n\n\n<style>.wp-block-kadence-image.kb-image5654_480b2d-48:not(.kb-specificity-added):not(.kb-extra-specificity-added) > figure{margin-top:var(--global-kb-spacing-lg, 3rem);}.kb-image5654_480b2d-48.kb-image-is-ratio-size, .kb-image5654_480b2d-48 .kb-image-is-ratio-size{max-width:374px;width:100%;}.wp-block-kadence-column > .kt-inside-inner-col > .kb-image5654_480b2d-48.kb-image-is-ratio-size, .wp-block-kadence-column > .kt-inside-inner-col > .kb-image5654_480b2d-48 .kb-image-is-ratio-size{align-self:unset;}.kb-image5654_480b2d-48 figure{max-width:374px;}.kb-image5654_480b2d-48 .image-is-svg, .kb-image5654_480b2d-48 .image-is-svg img{width:100%;}.kb-image5654_480b2d-48:not(.kb-image-is-ratio-size) .kb-img, .kb-image5654_480b2d-48.kb-image-is-ratio-size{padding-top:0px;}.kb-image5654_480b2d-48 .kb-image-has-overlay:after{opacity:0.3;border-top-left-radius:20px;border-top-right-radius:20px;border-bottom-right-radius:20px;border-bottom-left-radius:20px;}.kb-image5654_480b2d-48 img.kb-img, .kb-image5654_480b2d-48 .kb-img img{border-top-left-radius:20px;border-top-right-radius:20px;border-bottom-right-radius:20px;border-bottom-left-radius:20px;}<\/style>\n<div class=\"wp-block-kadence-image kb-image5654_480b2d-48\"><figure class=\"alignleft size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"791\" height=\"1024\" src=\"https:\/\/kingdomresourcesforchrist.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/Jon_Brandon_team_headshot_1-791x1024.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"kb-img wp-image-5660\" srcset=\"https:\/\/e-krc.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/Jon_Brandon_team_headshot_1-791x1024.png 791w, https:\/\/e-krc.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/Jon_Brandon_team_headshot_1-400x518.png 400w, https:\/\/e-krc.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/Jon_Brandon_team_headshot_1-600x777.png 600w, https:\/\/e-krc.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/Jon_Brandon_team_headshot_1-232x300.png 232w, https:\/\/e-krc.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/Jon_Brandon_team_headshot_1-768x994.png 768w, https:\/\/e-krc.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/Jon_Brandon_team_headshot_1-50x65.png 50w, https:\/\/e-krc.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/Jon_Brandon_team_headshot_1-1187x1536.png 1187w, https:\/\/e-krc.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/Jon_Brandon_team_headshot_1-9x12.png 9w, https:\/\/e-krc.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/Jon_Brandon_team_headshot_1.png 1545w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 791px) 100vw, 791px\" \/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Finding a Good Friend at a Low-key Party<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Since my wife and I moved to Boston over ten years ago, my friend Jonathan is almost al\u00adways the answer to the question, \u201cSo, how do you know so-and-so?\u201d He\u2019s a great cross-pollinator and has friends across many Christian communities around New England.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>We initially met at a quirky Christian guys meet-up Jonathan was hosting, just some food and conversation on church, life, and theology. It was the perfect group for me at the time, feeling out of sync with traditional church and wanting a more integrated faith-life. I think our an\u00adchoring connection, though, was our shared unspoken callings as itinerant ministers of sorts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Through my friendship with Jonathan over the years I have met many other Christians wanderers, some actively involved in their local church communities and some not. I met Brandon through Jonathan\u2019s New England guys meet-ups (sometimes low-key meals and sometimes fully planned out weekend re\u00adtreats).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>We immediately connected on having some similar movie and music interests that were outside of (and some in our experience, much more spiri\u00adtually engaging than) much of the usual Christian music and media. Everything from finding joy in awesomely bad \u201880s action movies to inspired mu\u00adsicians like Arrested Development, singing upbeat hip-hop songs about genuine struggles and trying to be better people in the world. We\u2019ve since shared in our deep interest in the life and works of the Chris\u00adtian mystics (like Guyon, Bonhoeffer, St. Francis, Brother Lawrence, and others) and partnered on nu\u00admerous articles and workshops.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Both of these friendships started with simple invita\u00adtions to sharing food and conversation, but they\u2019ve remained strong, I think, due to our shared commit\u00adment to each other as \u2018Christian brothers.\u2019 I regard both of these friends as close family. So whether it\u2019s helping each other move or some late-night commiserating about life\u2019s struggles, I know I have a safe space for help when needed, because they have each stuck with me at my best and my worst.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Both of these friendships started with simple invita\u00adtions to sharing food and conversation, but they\u2019ve remained strong, I think, due to our shared commit\u00adment to each other as \u2018Christian brothers.\u2019 I regard both of these friends as close family. So whether it\u2019s helping each other move or some late-night commiserating about life\u2019s struggles, I know I have a safe space for help when needed, because they have each stuck with me at my best and my worst. We also share in the work and ministry of Project Arctos, which has us constantly thinking and collaborating about how we can help others commune, create, and connect with God and each other better. While our talents and spiritual giftings are different, this shared vision of a more vibrant and engaged King\u00addom keeps us pushing each other forward in ministry.<\/p>\n\n\n<style>.wp-block-kadence-image.kb-image5654_4abd6a-98:not(.kb-specificity-added):not(.kb-extra-specificity-added) > figure{margin-top:var(--global-kb-spacing-md, 2rem);}.kb-image5654_4abd6a-98.kb-image-is-ratio-size, .kb-image5654_4abd6a-98 .kb-image-is-ratio-size{max-width:521px;width:100%;}.wp-block-kadence-column > .kt-inside-inner-col > .kb-image5654_4abd6a-98.kb-image-is-ratio-size, .wp-block-kadence-column > .kt-inside-inner-col > .kb-image5654_4abd6a-98 .kb-image-is-ratio-size{align-self:unset;}.kb-image5654_4abd6a-98 figure{max-width:521px;}.kb-image5654_4abd6a-98 .image-is-svg, .kb-image5654_4abd6a-98 .image-is-svg img{width:100%;}.kb-image5654_4abd6a-98 .kb-image-has-overlay:after{opacity:0.3;border-top-left-radius:100px;border-top-right-radius:100px;border-bottom-right-radius:100px;border-bottom-left-radius:100px;}.kb-image5654_4abd6a-98 img.kb-img, .kb-image5654_4abd6a-98 .kb-img img{border-top-left-radius:100px;border-top-right-radius:100px;border-bottom-right-radius:100px;border-bottom-left-radius:100px;}<\/style>\n<div class=\"wp-block-kadence-image kb-image5654_4abd6a-98\"><figure class=\"alignleft\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/vkl.umo.mybluehost.me\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/75-brotherly-love-2.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"kb-img\"\/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Make Space in Your Life for Christian Brothers<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Even with friends like these, though, it can be chal\u00adlenging to make time and stay connected as each of your lives grow fuller and sometimes farther away geographically. Where it was once easy to grab a near-weekly meal together, we sometimes struggle to make even a monthly coffee happen. To stay con\u00adnected we make some use of modern technologies, like keeping in touch by text message or schedul\u00ading virtual meet-ups. They aren\u2019t ideal mediums for connecting, but keep us connected between times of richer in-person fellowship.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>For these deeper times of connecting, I\u2019ve found we each have had to stretch ourselves and our schedules to continue to make it work. Jonathan is a new father this year and has accommodated our visits on evenings I\u2019m sure he and his wife, Julia, didn\u2019t really have the energy for.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Brandon uses pub\u00adlic transit and doesn\u2019t have an easy way to get to my house outside of the city, but he takes the extra time to commute out or the extra expense of a ride-share. We all forgo practical conveniences at times to make space for fellowship. We\u2019re each also flex\u00adible with what \u2018fellowship\u2019 might look like from meet-up to meet-up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Sometimes we\u2019re all business and jump right into deep conversations and ministry planning, but sometimes one of us just needs to vent or process without adding anything else heavy to their plate. This can cause some friction from time to time, as ministry progress can become very slow in the midst of the rest of life. At times, one or two of us will catch a burst of inspiration for new or existing ministry when the others simply don\u2019t have the capacity. It can be hard to match up energies and expectations sometimes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>And sometimes, we just get silly, and talk about music or movies, or argue over which of us would be \u2018Scott\u2019 from the X-Men comics (one of the strongest leaders, but least lik\u00adable characters in the Marvel universe).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I think this is one of the key elements to forming good friendships, to be willing to accommodate and to be open to new experiences, to be sensitive to and cater to each others\u2019 needs. The loneliest people I know tend to have a narrow idea about what they are willing or interested in doing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Most of my friendships start with just being out in the world and making connections in spaces that I wouldn\u2019t nor\u00admally be in. All of my best Christian friends from college (and my lovely wife, Audrey!) emerged from finally agreeing to check out the \u2018weird-to-me\u2019 fellowship service on campus one night. It was an uncomfortable experience for me, but by the end of the night I had met my best college friend and countless other great friends through him.<\/p>\n\n\n<style>.kb-image5654_74943f-c9.kb-image-is-ratio-size, .kb-image5654_74943f-c9 .kb-image-is-ratio-size{max-width:-145px;width:100%;}.wp-block-kadence-column > .kt-inside-inner-col > .kb-image5654_74943f-c9.kb-image-is-ratio-size, .wp-block-kadence-column > .kt-inside-inner-col > .kb-image5654_74943f-c9 .kb-image-is-ratio-size{align-self:unset;}.kb-image5654_74943f-c9 figure{max-width:-145px;}.kb-image5654_74943f-c9 .image-is-svg, .kb-image5654_74943f-c9 .image-is-svg img{width:100%;}.kb-image5654_74943f-c9 .kb-image-has-overlay:after{opacity:0.3;border-top-left-radius:50px;border-top-right-radius:50px;border-bottom-right-radius:50px;border-bottom-left-radius:50px;}.kb-image5654_74943f-c9 img.kb-img, .kb-image5654_74943f-c9 .kb-img img{border-top-left-radius:50px;border-top-right-radius:50px;border-bottom-right-radius:50px;border-bottom-left-radius:50px;}<\/style>\n<div class=\"wp-block-kadence-image kb-image5654_74943f-c9\"><figure class=\"alignleft\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/vkl.umo.mybluehost.me\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/75-brotherly-love-3.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"kb-img\"\/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>I\u2019m more and more convinced that the best way you can foster a good friendship is to go and do some\u00adthing they want to do (even if you really don\u2019t want to). You don\u2019t have to be fake or make it your new hobby, just being open and sharing the experi\u00adence is enough.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I\u2019m incredibly grateful for all of my friends, for bearing with me in all my quirks, and making time and space in their lives to be genuine brothers and sisters in Christ together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n<style>.wp-block-kadence-spacer.kt-block-spacer-5654_1f60c1-bf .kt-block-spacer{height:39px;}.wp-block-kadence-spacer.kt-block-spacer-5654_1f60c1-bf .kt-divider{border-top-width:1px;height:1px;border-top-color:#eee;width:80%;border-top-style:solid;}<\/style>\n<div class=\"wp-block-kadence-spacer aligncenter kt-block-spacer-5654_1f60c1-bf\"><div class=\"kt-block-spacer kt-block-spacer-halign-center\"><hr class=\"kt-divider\"\/><\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity is-style-wide\"\/>\n\n\n\n<p>Matt, Jonathan, and Bran\u00addon (with inspiration and help from other friends and ministry partners!) began the ministry work of Project Arctos in Bos\u00adton in 2017. Seeking God\u2019s movement from the traditional churches of their youths to a more integrated and engaged spirituality for the 21st century, they\u2019ve set out to elevate voices from the margins who are living out and struggling through what it looks like to be vibrant Kingdom Cit\u00adizens in our world today. In partnership with the King\u00addom Resources for Christ ministry, Project Arctos has grown to include online and in-person workshops, free online Christian resources, and published over 100 articles from everyday Christians for all to enjoy and benefit from. You can learn more about what we do and how to get involved at projectarctos.com.<a href=\"https:\/\/www.projectarctos.com\/\">https:\/\/www.projectarctos.com\/<\/a>. The original text of this article appears on page 9 of the English unit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group\"><div class=\"wp-block-group__inner-container is-layout-constrained wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<div style=\"height:53px\" aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"wp-block-spacer\"><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Translation\/Lin Yu met a close friend at a low-key party. Since my wife and I moved to Boston ten years ago, whenever someone asks: &quot;How do you know...<\/p>","protected":false},"author":12,"featured_media":5662,"template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"give_campaign_id":0,"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":""},"issue":[241],"section":[85],"class_list":["post-5654","article","type-article","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","issue-issue-75","section-kingdom-knowledge-practice"],"acf":[],"taxonomy_info":{"issue":[{"value":241,"label":"75\u671f"}],"section":[{"value":85,"label":"\u795e\u570b\u77e5\u884c Kingdom Knowledge &amp; Practice"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/e-krc.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/Issue-75_banner_\u5144\u5f1f\u4e4b\u611b_a.png",1000,400,false],"author_info":{"display_name":"Matt Reffie (\u5442\u9081\u98db)","author_link":"https:\/\/e-krc.org\/en\/author\/matt-reffie\/"},"comment_info":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/e-krc.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article\/5654","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/e-krc.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/article"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/e-krc.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/article"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/e-krc.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/12"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/e-krc.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/5662"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/e-krc.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5654"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"issue","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/e-krc.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/issue?post=5654"},{"taxonomy":"section","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/e-krc.org\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/section?post=5654"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}